I'll be a fool for you

Miley Cirus tops the chats with stupid songs, I bet that bimbo doesn't even know what a crotchet is.

An Open Letter to a friend who is so horrible at being a conversationalist and so dexterous at being a debate enthusiast.

Hello boy, I seriously cannot fathom why you love to fastidiously transmogrify every conversation at the dinner table into an argument, and to actually add salt to the ulcer you ardently want to clinch victory, every corner you turn you must find a slice of cheese. Hello, life is not like that if I were in the mood I am sorry but I would have to own your size zero ass because it is easy to turn the tides against your shallow arguments. Swim deeper boy, we are dolphins.

Alright fine, you don't like to indulge in the computer game my hopeless zombie of a brother is heavily addicted to but it don't give you grounds to insult it. Come clean shall we? Singapore will snow, it is because you are simply deplorable at the game. If you aren't even good at something isn't it obvious you will hate it as much as Paris Hilton hates prison life? So much for the simple life.

I am so not in praise of this vulnerable man. Even in MMORPGs, like hello, learn to be as independent as Singapore can be. Look, the merlion lives out of water and doesn't even complain, for a fish/beast (which is it?) out of water it sure fares better than you when you quest alone. Whoops, bitchy much. Even when you engage in meaningless endeavors there is no dire need to flare up into bestial vigor bent on forcing me to expunge all my loves and likes. What I like is what I like to do, what game I like to play does not have any impact on your life, you won't get a penny for every enemy i slay. Out of wavering goodwill I propose an invitation for you to be a small part of my life but you hastily bash it down, fine. I can live with it. Good intentions doesn't get good results. Learned that like a zillion times now.

A simple decent altruistic proposal and you manage to morph it into a bull fight. Well done boy, try The Arena where the little school kids spray their saliva out at each other. I swear the saliva spun could have been used to construct the Bird's Nest stadium for the China Beijing Olympics.

My stupid brother without a sense of family responsibility just brought food up to eat, pray the roaches infest his room and stuff themselves into his foul mouth. The maid heats up food for the screaming diva and he eats 7 hours later when the bread has collected enough dew for a cup of water.

Back to the friend, I despise your tenacity. What was supposedly a virtue has been tainted by your sinking moral compass. You arduously pursue petty matters, life loves you boy. I can't be bothered to actually lambast you because it'll just shatter our tenuous relationship.

Wow, its been long since i flexed my mind muscle, not that I have much.

You know, you do what you do best boy, fiercely fight for your win. Spin enough phlegm for bird's nest soup. Inflation is bad, save while you can. I'll just sit back and watch your face glisten in the moonlight as rainbows cast an iridescent glow on the eternal horizon. Cheers!

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Remember to speak with shadows on the wall, they can't hear you, you're sure to elude defeat.